(Bi)Sexuality.

While browsing the internets, I stumbled upon an interesting post about bisexuality and the attitudes of non-bisexuals about it. It inspired me to comtenplate my own feelings on it. If that doesn't sound very interesting to you, you probably shouldn't read on, because this will be long.

I am going to ignore the side that believes that heterosexual is the only way you can be (and that homosexuality is a choice and a sin blah blah blah), because no one who believes that should have the address to this blog.

I first encountered anti-bisexual material while watching Queer As Folk. There was a storyline where one of the characters had an experience with the opposite sex, and everyone was shocked. I believe one of the lines in response to it was (pardon the vulgarity): “You can like cock, or you can like pussy, you just can't like both at the same time.” There was not one person who accepted it as a simple sign of bisexuality. I found this a little shocking. How can a show that has been billed as getting at queer issues and pushing for equality be so dismissing towards a huge part of the gay community? But as I poked around, I found more and more anti-bisexual sentiments among both gay and straight people, even those who call themselves open-minded. How can anyone be open-minded and look at sexuality as black and white?

There are a lot of arguments for bisexuality not existing. One of my favorites is, “gay men like men, so if a guy likes men he's gay.” This is a classic example of bad logic. If A then B. B, therefore A. That is not correct. That is wrong. Wrong! It is like saying “Fishermen live in Seattle, so if a person lives in Seattle he or she is a fisherman.” Just because a man is sexually attracted to a man does not exclude him from being sexually attracted to a woman. Just because someone who has been sexually attracted to women has never liked a man does NOT mean that: b.) that they can never be sexually attracted to men (maybe it just hasn't happened yet) OR b) that no one else who has been sexually attracted to women can be sexually attracted to men. No one can say what another person likes, we can only speak for ourselves. I don't tell people they can't like tuna fish just because I don't, because I don't have their taste buds, and cannot prove they don't like it. If we isolate genes for sexual attractions to the different genders, then we can tell someone what they should and shouldn't like. Until then, we're just being narrow-minded and ridiculous.

But that's just purely sexual attraction. There are lots of other things that attract people to people: personality, power, even things like possessions (cars, yachts, private islands, etc.). I call myself gay because up until this point I have only been sexually attracted to males. I won't deny the possibility in my future that maybe I'll meet some amazing woman who I decide I want to spend my life with based purely on her amazing personality (or even sexual attraction, although the chances of that seem slim at this point). I think the same could probably happen to anyone (but if they would be able to accept it based off of their own ideas on sexuality is another story).

And that's my two cents.